Halloween Movie Rankings

Halloween Movie Rankings

By Desmond Homann, Variety Editor Originally published in Issue 4, Volume 33 of The University Register on October 23, 2020

It's almost Halloween, so here are some of my favorite spooky movies put in categories and ranked:

Scariest:

  1. Mirrors — This one messed me up BIG TIME for several months. I’ve rewatched it once, but that second time never beats the first.

  2. Would You Rather? — Cutting open an eye? No thanks! Drowning? No thanks!

  3. Rosemary’s Baby — I’ll be honest, I cried when it was done because I was just that uncomfortable.

  4. The Grudge — Original, remake, or remake again, this one is CREEPY. I saw the most recent remake in theaters back before COVID, and while it has lower ratings, I was all curled up in my seat trying to hide in my coat.

  5. Dark Skies — Stop putting kids in dangerous spots in horror movies! Spooky! This one has aliens, too.

Personal Favorites

  1. Before I Wake — This movie has a special place in my heart because it is written well, doesn’t rely on jumpscares, doesn’t hurt the child characters, and has a happy ending all while being super creepy. Seriously my favorite horror movie and I cannot recommend it enough.

  2. Pan’s Labyrinth — Doug Jones is easily the most interesting and talented performer I can think of. He’s got two unique characters here AND he learned to speak Spanish for this film.

  3. Housebound — I cannot stop rewatching this one! It has the sweetest movie monster I can think of (with the other villain of the movie being downright sociopathic) and it has a goofy ending.

  4. Corpse Bride — While many people favor “Nightmare Before Christmas” this is my preferred TIm Burton movie right now.

  5. The Saw movies — I am NOT a gore person normally, but I sure do love that funky little doll! The Saw movies aren’t that scary, mostly just gross, but I think they’re a little goofy because they aren’t always the best written films you can find.

Classics

  1. Tim Burton movies — It would take too long to pick just a few out, so I’ll lump them all together here.

  2. Hellraiser — I have seen this movie over ten times and still could not tell you what is actually going on.

  3. Monster House — I think I watch this one every year just to get in a Halloween mood.

  4. Get Out — While newer, this movie has already become a classic and is one that I would recommend to anyone who hasn’t seen it yet.

  5. The Shining — Not my favorite, but I guess I can see why so many people love it. It’s certainly intense!

Goofiest/So Bad It's Good

  1. Bones — YES this is Snoop Dogg’s horror movie and YES it is unintentionally hilarious. Watch it with friends and prepare for some of the worst special effects you’ve ever seen.

  2. Hunger — My friends and I hold a “guac night” where we make guacamole and rewatch this movie just to yell at the characters. Sometimes it just feels good to get mad at someone fictional, especially if they’re having sex at the bottom of a well!

  3. Beyond the Gates — Can I call this the horror version of “Jumanji?” I sure would like to. The main characters get sucked into a scary VHS game while trying to solve the case of their father’s disappearance.

  4. Housebound — Previously listed, but should be mentioned here because it is a decent horror comedy.

  5. Apartment 143 — Low ratings and many jumpscares, what more could you want?

These lists were simply my opinions, so if you're someone who actually knows things about movies, don't rip my head off please!!

Image on top courtesy of USU Statesman